[Sussex] New chemical element discovered...

[Andrew Guard]

A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the
heaviest chemical element yet known to science. The new element has been
tentatively named "Governmentium". Governmentium has one neutron, 12
assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 11 assistant deputy neutrons,
giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by
forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like
particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert.
However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes
into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium causes one reaction to take
over four days to complete when it would normally take less than a second. 
Governmentium has a normal half-life of three years; it does not decay, but
instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant
neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass
will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more
morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron
promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Governmentium is formed
whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical
quantity is referred to as "Critical Morass". You will know it when you see
it.
USA Patented Pending.

_____________________________________ 
Andrew Guard

IT Support
 


  Direct:(01342) 840840
Office:(01342) 840800
Fax:(01342) 840888
Email:agua at coinford.co.uk

____________________________________________
Coinford Ltd
Redeham Hall
137 Redehall Road
Burstow
Surrey
RH6 9RJ


Java Script Flash e-mail. © My eyes are red partnership 2001-2003 All Rights
Reserved. Used under licence


Have an Merry Christmas and a happy New Year.