[sclug] OT: Social question

Phillip Chandler phillip.chandler at ntlworld.com
Sun May 31 20:23:08 UTC 2009

On Sun, 2009-05-31 at 19:58 +0000, ed wrote:
> Hash: SHA1
> On Sun, May 31, 2009 at 08:04:12PM +0100, Neil Brown wrote:
> > I've had absolutely no problem making female friends - most of my
> > friends are female, I'd guess - but, finding someone I wanted as a
> > girlfriend was much harder. However, since Newbury is a small place, and
> > I wanted to avoid going down the line of a relationship with anyone in
> > the same company, my options were limited... I make a lot of friends
> > online, and often meet up with people who I first met online (SCLUG
> > being an example), and, for me, it's this combination which has worked
> > best- a chance to really chat to people and find out about them, prior
> > to meeting them.
> You're very right, Newbury is a small place. With only three or four
> clubs I keep bumping into exes. One night this month I counted three in
> one club :( The first two are not a problem, but for me with the third,
> I still have some very deep emotions for. Sadly though, I can't stand
> seeing her with her new boy friend.
> So, I think the geographically distant thing does have some advantages -
> if you are prone to getting emotionally attached perhaps. Perhaps if I
> wasn't so needy then this wouldn't be such a problem for me.
> Do you frequent the clubs at all Neil? There is sweet FA to do here.
> > As it happened, I met up with a girl, having chatted and got on well
> > online, and we came away from the date each thinking "Phew-  I won't
> > have to see her again" - online / at-a-distance impressions can be wrong.
> > 
> > Or, perhaps not, since, having continued to chat to each other online
> > afterwards, we realised that we really did get on with each other, and
> > that the first date had just not worked out... We met up again,
> > immediately clicked that time, and we're still together, and very
> > happily so.
> This is quite interesting. I've had a lot of first and second dates that
> then fizzle into nothing, perhaps I should get some emails/texts going a
> bit more. It's that 'getting to know you' part that normally draws an
> epic fail.
> > Local is better, though - the previous attempt (met through a Linux
> > forum!) was in the US, and the first meeting was in Canada. That was
> > less successful, although, I did have a great few days in Toronto, even
> > if it was seeing sights on my own during the more fraught patches. I did
> > manage to fix all the issues on her netbook, though, so, not a complete
> > failure!
> To me local is within 5 miles - although I have started talking to a
> Russian lass on the internet.

I started talking to a russian lass, and by the 2nd email she wanted to
have my children. I would have sent them too, but a 1st class stamp just
wouldnt cover the cost of sending them.

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